Exes. We all have them.
In my first blog as a buzz girl, I wanted to bring up another touchy topic and throw a funny/sarcastic spin on it. I’ve decided to categorize a few well-known types of exes, I’m sure we’ve all experienced at least one of the types. As with all my blogs, I ask that you do not take offense to what I write as it is for entertainment purposes only. Enjoy.
Beggars can’t be choosers
Let’s say you have just been dumped by (insert ex’s name here) and you feel like…well….crap. If you’re a girl, you’re over-analyzing everything that went wrong, or that you think was said wrong, or that you did wrong….get my point? And if you’re a guy, you’re out with your buddies at the bar, or maybe you’re over-analyzing everything just as much…who knows, I’m not a guy. The moral of the story is, you feel low for a while and then eventually (usually after 2 ½-3 months) time heals your wounds and you’re over the past. Then who decides to pop back up in your life? Your ex. Nine times out of ten they’ll come back saying something along the lines of ‘what I did was wrong, I know I messed up’ , they’ll claim they’ve seen the light and have changed and they’ll also throw in a compliment or two to butter you up (i.e “You are so different/better than the rest”). These are the exes that are practically begging for you to get back with them. Have they changed? Chances are, no. Do they miss your attention? Ding-ding-ding! You’ll also see this kind of ex pop up if they’ve heard/noticed you going after another guy/girl. They don’t want you, but they don’t want anyone else to have you either. Now, I can’t sit here and tell you that if you were on the other end of the story and you were coming back to your ex, you wouldn’t have a legitimate reason. But, just keep in mind that actions speak louder than words. If they/you have changed, make sure they/you SHOW it. Talk is very cheap.
“Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned”
Even though this type of ex can be seen in both genders, a majority of the time we see this in women. This is the ex that is trying to make your life miserable at any cost, and loves to ruin your day. Let’s say you broke up with your ex civilly, or so you thought, because you two see each other quite often. Obviously they didn’t take it too well and they start plotting against you. I’m not kidding about how much effort they put into this, it takes quite a lot of work to plan out misery. You’ll walk out to your car and find stuff on it, probably stuff relating to your past relationship. They’ll act super sweet and calm to your face, yet say nothing but nasty things about you behind your back (although that’s most women today, unfortunately). Then when they see that you’re no longer affected by their tricks and mind games, they’ll kick it up a notch. They might even bring their flavor of the week and show them off. Moral of the story is, they’re just trying to push your buttons. No matter how much it affects you, don’t give in. Keep in mind that misery loves company and because they’re so upset with what happened, they’d love to bring you down to their level. And for those ladies who are considering this or are guilty of doing this, my advice is to choose a better option. It’s a known fact that there is no better revenge than living well.
Friend Zoned (in a good way)
This is the ex that you two hit it off as friends, got into a relationship and it failed. But, surprisingly you two seemed to get past the ever so awkward ‘we kissed before’ and mended your friendship. You two just can’t live without each other and are thrilled when the other finds a new partner. This is a fantastic way to end a relationship, but honestly I’ve only seen it done in movies.
Are you from Jamaica? Because you’re Jamaican me crazy…..literally.
They always say that there is a fine line between love and hate; this relationship will definitely test that line. The sad part about an ex like this is your relationship was probably the same way, always hot and cold. This is the ex you’ll love to hate. The incredible amounts of confusion and stress that occurred in the relationship will eventually make you feel like you’re crazy and you’ll learn to resent that person. You’ll find that you can’t get back together with them, can’t be just friends with them and probably can’t even be around them or else all the emotional craziness will come back. Just save your sanity and cut them out of your life, it’s better for you in the long run. Promise.
There’s a reason why I added snake to the title. This ex is very similar to the scorned ex, except they’re a little better at acting. They snake their way into your life and are the best friend ever; they may even say things along the lines of “I just want to be in your life, even if it’s just friends” and if you’re in another relationship, they’d say “You seem happy and I don’t want to ruin that for you.” After they’ve buttered you up and slithered back into your life with bad intentions, now starts the sabotage. This sabotage works especially well if you were the one who was dumped, the feelings come back much quicker and once they’ve got you hooked, you’re a goner. Nine times out of ten, they’ll end up pulling the same stuff that ended the relationship before, but don’t worry; it happens to the best of us. Treat it as a life lesson.
This ex is the one that haunts you, it’s the one you let get away. This is the ex you kick yourself every day for ever letting go and you constantly are reminded of the mistake you made.
But in a negative light, this type of ex could also be the one that angered you the most. Maybe they played games with your head or just messed around enough for you to be stuck on them. All you can hope for is time to fade the pain, or whatever you feel, and then the ghost will disappear. The most important thing to remember is to not let your ghosts control your present.
I have some great news for all of you, I have been asked to turn my blogging into an “Ask Sarah” column. I’ll be inserting one of my regular blogs (of course) and then at the bottom I’ll answer any questions, give any advice, share some stories….whatever you would like. Feel free to begin giving me some material for next week’s blog by commenting on this one. Thank you so very much for your support & I’m so excited to be on here permanently.
Love always, Sarah Buzz